A line that possibly could be the reason alot of us lost our virginity when we were 14 was the prelude to the Best weekend that I had spent on Penang island in a very long time. There was nothing more that I could wish I had done because there was simply not enough time. And sleep.
The best thing about life is that the best thing always happen without us planning for it to happen and when it does happen, you would not even realize that it had happened. But you know what is the best thing about that?
The best thing did happen.
Life is Spontaneous. To hell with planning because the only plan we ever need is the floor blueprint that showed us the quickest exit out of our best friend's house when his grandma busted our ass watching porno in his living room when we were supposed to be stuying for PMR.
All in all, Fuck planning. Fuck the future. Fuck me if I could not live in the moment because I am afraid of the consequences of tomorrow- a day that may not come after all.
My weekend was so splendidly memorable for I had accomplished an impossible amount of shit over two days. Most people like to rub it slow and take it in easy over the weekends as I would occasionally like to lay on my couch thinking about what it would have been like to play one-on-one basketball with Jesus. I think Jesus would win, but I'm pretty sure that I could score 2 or 3 times, assuming he was unable to use any Jesus superpowers during the game. Afterwards we would laugh about embarrasing memories over manna and winewater. Maybe he would tell me a few dirty jokes before getting up abruptly, hiting me with some dap, and leaving.
Jesus was busy over the weekend and I was left with my own devices. Of boredom annihilation. Regardless of the company, I am fully capable of making fun out of the dumbest situation because we are referring to the type of imbecile who believes there is fun even in watching paint dry. If there was a bottle of Vodka lying around some where.
I wouldn't trade my best weekend in Penang for a million bucks. I'd do it for two million but I doubt anyone would pay that much for a weekend that did not even involve any sex. The only possibility of sex was with her, but I doubt anyone would pay two million bucks for a fuck.
My million bucks weekend involved:
1. Meeting up with a friend whom I have not seen in almost three years
2. Clubbing/ getting drunk for the sake of going out on a Friday nite
3. Hanging out at the beach after club for the sake of getting drunk and tripping on my ultra awesome iPOd playlist accompanied by the sound of crashing ocean waves
4. Star gazing and taking lotsa pisses into the ocean because the fluoride luminosity phenomenon was a really awesome experience when drunk. Hanging out at the beach in the pee hours of the morning was so awesome that I even decided to throw my bottle of Absolut Kurant into the sea for future consumption of any lucky pirates or turtles alike
5. Watching the sky turned from black to blue to a heavy pouring motherfucker and making a run for the car when drunk while maintaining balance with my middle finger flashed at a snobbish international school white kid who was laughing at my drunken antics and another hand waving at his 15 year old chic in a manner that could possibly either suggest "Wanna suck my Malaysian dick?" or "I'm So air-groping your titties right now"
6. Choking on Dim Sum while making fun of a middle-aged fat chinese server who looked like 50Cent, a 70 year old granny who looked like a Groupie, calling a 3 year old kid in spaghetti strings a slut, accusing a 50 year old lady who was wearing her monster-shades indoor of being the biggest whore with 5 husbands when she was young not realizing that she was actually suffering from cataract
7. Feeding cat fishes and tortoises at college pond while trying to hit on every head-scarfed Muslim girls who seem to walk by my sweet talkings rather hurriedly
8. Hurling racial insults at the half-scottish half chinese chic whom I was with for suggesting such stupid un-reproductive activity like feeding fishes at ungodly hours of the morning that I had not slept in the last 30 hours
9. Attending a nostalgic public speaking event that I had taken part when I was in high school and not win
10. Staring at 17 year old girls' great cleavages. I wish I was in high school now because boy, either time has changed a fuck load or breast-enlargement is included in the compulsory fee structure for Penang high school girls
11. Getting an sms from my best girl friend reminding me that she would kick my balls if I still hadn't slept since last nite while I was trying to nap in the hall when the fat kid who would later win the competition was talking shit on stage
12. Sleeping with a palpitating heart and waking up every 20 minutes scared shitless that I would miss the time to party at nite
13. Dressing up for Penang's 1st Lomo photography event opening party and ended up missing the whole party because of a dumb plate of Marmite chicken, a bowl of seaweed soup and claypot toofoo that tasted like chicken crap
14. Stumbling onto an awesome joint that plays jazz with live bands playing out oldies, looking like the most stylish dude in the place, as usual- but with no money
15. Helping my girl friend hit on a dude in a club who turned out to be gay, who was actually trying to hit on me as I was trying to get the attention of a really hot chic who was interested in the aforementioned gay dude
16. Returning home to the prospect of sleeping after staying awake for more than 40 hours only to find that the fuckin' keys wouldn't open the fuckin' door to my friend's fuckin' house and no one was fuckin' around to open the fuckin' door. Climbed in thru the toilet window drunk and almost died a little-less-than-glorious death by falling headfirst into the toilet bowl and drown
17. Hanging out at Penang's cool once-a-month heritage flea market
18. Meeting the Reader's Digest critically acclaimed recycling green enthusiaist odd-ball couple that made up www.greencrusaders.com
19. Hanging out at my first outdoor live music event in Penang
20. Buying a super fuckin' awesome antique pocket watch for 27 bucks
21. My first taste of mexican food in Penang cooked by Pedro, the bandana-wearing unfriendly Malaysian who wished he was a Mexican drug lord
22. Meeting Mr.I'm-So-High-and-Fucked-Up Uncle who sang Louis Armstrong's shit after reciting his fuckin' inebriated gibberish take on his cover song for 1/2 hour and going back to his gibberish take after every two line of singing. Possibly the reason why Pedro was such an unhappy man
23. Spending a whole shit load of money eating crazy food like Japanese/Mexican/Chinese/wine shit for the weekend suggesting either I'm working a five-figure salary or my dad just found a fuckin' diamond mine in his backyard
24. Hitting on hot guitarist chic from Penang up-coming indie band, Paku who introduced me to the great Jimmy Boyle of Penang
25. I was out having fun doing whatever shit I like and felt like doing at any moment, be it rain or shine, drunk or sober
More importantly, I believe my weekend was awesome because I did not get laid as I was hanging out with my best buddy, Lingz who never gave a fuck about anything.
We came, we saw and we always had Fun in Penang. All the Damn time.
"What do you want to do now?"
"I don't know"
"Ok, Let's go somewhere"
This is what university student life is all about. It's not about studying. It's not about playing stupid computer games. It's not about spending all your damn time glued to your significant other. It may be about debating. It could be about sleeping with as many girls as one could manage an erection. It should involve getting drunk. But most of all, it is certainly all about having as much crazy Fun as possible in this short phase of life that spans an average period of four years. Now is the only time of my life when I could do all sorts of shit as irresponsibly as possible. It is a re-run of my American life, albeit slightly edited.
Fuck all you stupid fuckheads who could only think of graduating as soon as possible and work for the rest of your life. People like you should just die young or live in a permanent vegetative state, forever regretting the time you had not taken your shot at life when you were able because you were shy, too chicken shit or just plain boring.
People who are working yearn to be in their studying days when idiots in school want to be done soon and join the elite group of sorry ass tax-paying morons who wish to live in the past.
At this point, my life could not have been better. Or more Ironic.
1 Comments:
well said, darling. well said. i guess it shouldnt matter wherever you are, you just have to learn to say; what the heck, lets do it.
if only you were here, kit. maybe then you could give me a good time. ;p
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