one KIT wonder

Hanging out with Anrie this evening, was nothing short of awesome although it was only for a short period of time. I love that girl. She reminds me of all my wonderful platonic girlfriends back in the States whom I can be totally open about anything without the risk or worry that things could get weird between us. I miss having girlfriends that I can just call up and talk to just about anything at anytime, women whom I could hug just because either of us needed a hug, women whom I can sleep next to without having to be naked or doing something funky.

Girlfriends are awesome because sometimes, you just can’t possibly talk to a dude about certain stuff. You need a woman’s perspective in life, a somewhat softer, more subtle, feminine approach to things that men would simply just ruin with our bloated ego. An inexplicable difference that I can’t seem to put my finger on but somehow things are just different when we talk things over with the other gender. And believe me that it is just a bloody sweet bonus when they somehow hooks you up with their hot girl buddies whom you do not necessary need to remain on platonic terms with. .

Okay, I lied. Of course it is all about her girl buddies.

I miss Crystal. I remember the first coupla times when we started hanging out and we hugged. She complained that I did not give her a REAL hug. In truth, I actually felt akward about the whole hugging bit because it was not really an Asian thing to go around hugging everyone. Then I realized the power of a sincere platonic Hug.

And then I came home.

Innocently, I went around hugging everyone with the same sincere tenacity only to be greeted with akwardness and a whole lot of WTF-ness. In turn, I have learnt to again draw a thicker line when it comes to physical contacts with my friends at home.

I do not understand. Why it must always be that when a woman and a man hang out- they most certainly have to be dating or fucking each other? Why can’t they just bloody want to hang out ‘cos they simply want to get to know each other? That both feel comfortable with each other’s company on a very platonic level. That they both sincerely care for each other simply because they are Friends?

It is either I look like the biggest pervert in town or we are still living in 1850’s because the last few girls that I tried to hang out with thought that I harbour feelings for them. The worst crap was when they get all worked up when they found out that I went out with other women as well. WTF? God damned immature Sucker bitches Fag hag whores.

Let me rewind the whole thing. You and Me. We hang out. I give you extra attention because I think you are an interesting person and I am beginning to enjoy your company as a friend. We hang out more. Sometimes, I buy you thoughtful stuff to express my appreciation for your company, simply because- you are a girl and I know girls take fancy when guys take notes of little things and do things for them unexpectedly. We talked more. I went out with other people and you got pissed ‘cos we were supposed to be Dating. W-T-F? Never, at any point during our times together did I say that I like you. Never did I do anything that suggested I would want anything more than a platonic relationship ie. Trying to smooch you or remove any pieces of your garment. Why do people always think way ward? Can’t you understand that I just want to hang out as Friends? I am not even talking about hanging out as in “Hanging Out” that comes with sex or mutual feelings. These are just hanging out as in how I would hang out with a dude. Any thoughts of sex will only conjure up acute feelings of nausea followed by throwing up of yesterday’s lunch. Thank you.

I like to talk. I like to listen to other people’s idea. I like to share experiences and laugh over things. I like to be able to be myself with everyone else even if you are a girl and I am somehow expected to be more decent with you because that is how our conservative society works. I am sorry that I led all of you idiots on. My bad that you all live in the feudal Japan. How unfortunate. I do not lie, so take it seriously when I say that I do not think that I am worthy to be in relationships. I am all for fucking but as of now, I just want to be Friends with Everyone.

As I write, my thoughts drifted back to Anrie. I gave her a stalk of rose today ‘cos she complained that no one gave her shit for Valentines’s Day. Boy, was that silly girl happy when she got a belated V Day gift that only cost me like 5 bucks. Honestly, I’d pay any money to see anyone be happy. If only money could buy happiness. I don’t get it. Anrie ain’t like fuckin’ butt ugly and neither was a coupla of my other girl friends. I am pretty sure all of them are seeing someone or two, maybe 15 but why did all of them bitches got shit for a nice lovely day like St. Valentine’s ? Why didn’t even one asshole out of the 15 that they are seeing thought of buying something, anything to cheer up their day? Why can’t dudes pay a’lil more attention to what them females want? All my bastard buddies went on the whole bullshit that Valentine’s Day is too commercialized, that it is pointlessly stupid to waste shit loads of money blah blah blah- I say Fuck that shit. Valentine’s may be commercialized but it is still One Sweet Day. Given a choice, I’d buy every girl a stalk of rose on Valentine’s just to show my appreciation that women are just simply fuckin’ awesome (when they hook you up with the hotter of their kind, that is). Those are WOMEN that us men are talking about. They love it when men shower them with attention. Who doesn’t? Women love it when men go out of their way to do stupid pointless stuff for them or am I the biggest idiot around? Even so, let us then go purely on men instinct that Everything boils down to Sex- wouldn’t it only be Logical that men do all the sweet lil’ things in the world to their women so that they can get laid on Valentine’s? Maybe I am just a silly romantic. Maybe I am a fuckin’ outdated fucktard.

Oh well, my buddy got her stalk of rose and my last minute Valentine’s date got her free meal and a cliché teddy bear. It was indeed one sweet day.

FUCK! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT MY AMERICAN LOVE, TAMMY TRUONG! GODDAMNIT! FUCK! BASTARD! SHIT! COCKSUCKER! ASSFUCK!